Holding Hands

You have felt it.

A fleeting moment when life became electric and filled with joy.

These moments come when you least expect them; I’ve experienced only a handful. Looking back, I remember the feeling more than the circumstances.

What is that? Where does it come from? Why can’t we hold onto it?

Relational energy is life’s essence. We feel it in the presence of a close friend, a romantic partner, or a special place or work of art. Relational energy resonates in our being. One might call it a Spirit.

Spirit energy extends far beyond what we know or believe. Everyone knows what love is, but that’s not the same as being in love. Spirit energy fills the space between ourselves and the world. Pain accompanys its absence.

How do we bring Spirit energy more fully into our lives?

I think it helps to remember that rather than coming to us as it is, the world comes to us as we are. We assume that reality is fixed and given, that it is what it is, until we share an event with someone who experiences it entirely differently. If you’re married, you know what I mean.

Our challenge is this: We experience life from the perspective of Self, which we must then transcend to find belonging.

Perhaps we’ve got it wrong from the beginning? What if our life-purpose isn’t about self-improvement and fulfillment, but rather about holding hands? This seems more consistent with a universe that pulls everything together, from atoms to molecules to organisms; and from planets to galaxies.

We resist this pull, as if the “Self” were separate from the outside world. This, of course, is an illusion.

It isn’t easy to hold hands with life. We are set in our ways, and life isn't always kind. Perhaps we could begin with baby steps; asking ourselves a simple question: Am I passing judgment, or am I searching for a way to hold hands? The answer reveals our overriding context: Me or We.

Even as we erect barriers, Spirit surrounds us. The fleeting electric moments of my life happened unexpectedly in the absence of personal preferences, opinions, and beliefs. To live more joyfully, we must become more present to this energy.

I’m convinced it requires practice. Routine time-outs from our mind’s relentless chatter awaken us to the relationships around us.

It also requires vulnerability. I don’t like to dance because I’m afraid I’ll look stupid. Self-consciousness keeps us from doing a lot of things. It’s fun to be around people who are missing the self-consciousness gene. They invite connections.

Holding hands with life really shouldn’t be so hard.

What are we waiting for?

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If you are new to this blog, each Sunday, I post a topic relevant to the pursuit of a life well-lived, filled with joy, meaning, and belonging.

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